May 3, 2011
Student: Have you ever forgotten more than you thought you could forget?
Michael: Interesting question, but could you get a little more specific?
Student: Well, something weird has been occurring in that I thought I knew what mind was, but in turning back to itself, there is such emptiness that no description really remains. I dont know what mind is any more. I dont know what I am any more. I mean I know that I fulfill all these roles at work, at home and in the world, but its like Im losing a sense of being rooted at all. Its bizarre, like I have some type of sudden, spiritually oriented forgetfulness.
Michael: Yeah. I know what you mean. When we start to wake up, its less about what were learning and more about what were unlearning. Less about what were hanging on to and more about what were letting go of.
Student: That makes sense. Its like the Big Self doesnt need to know mind or anything else, or does it?
Michael: The Big Self doesnt need anything.
Student: It doesnt even need to exist. It just is. And something will always arise out of its tenderness. Does this make sense? It is just strange.
Michael: Do you want it to make sense, or do you simply want to rest as that tenderness?
Student: Oh yeah. Thank you. So, I dont really know how to ask this so Ill just fire away: what brought you back.
Michael: Back from what?
Student: From your, I dont know, summit experience. What brought you back down the mountain, so to speak?
Michael: Well, I spent a while forgetting what it meant to be human. Beer, football and peanut butter brought me back, but only partially. But Im still forgetting that Im here and that Im necessary, on the one hand. On the other hand I also feel passionately driven to share this stuff while I live as a functioning member of society. I guess the big deal is that despite my blend of passion and non-attachment, I dont get caught that much anymore. As the awakening process unfolds, this whole life gets pretty relaxing. Make sure that you enjoy how life begins to express itself through you as your shifts begin and end. I mean youre already on the cusp of this and probably have begun to feel how the mind gets reconfigured in ways that allow it to work in tandem with No Mind: the ultimate in reorientation. Its pretty cool, but we need to continue our practice in order for it to stabilize.
Student: Thank you.